Irrationally Yours
by CapeCodPhoenix
Summary: Hanna and Aria find themselves in love, not just with their boyfriends, but with each other as well. They've been lucky so far, escaping even A's notice, but how long will that last? Hanna/Aria as requested by CoolasDuck. Rated M just in case. *on hiatus*
1. Chapter 1: Aria

**Hanna/Aria story as requested by CoolasDuck. The chapters will alternate between Aria's POV and Hanna's POV. This story begins in Aria's POV**

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If I had taken my eyes off of Hanna for one second, I might have noticed the dingy carpets that hadn't been cleaned in months, I might have noticed that the mirror on the wall was broken, I might have seen the blood stain on the chair in the corner, or the holes in the sheets, I might have noticed that this was a place that neither Hanna nor I would want to be caught dead in, but then I suppose that was the point, not to be caught.

I pushed Hanna against the motel room door, our lips connecting desperately as they hadn't been able to all week. I felt her hands grasping my hair, attempting to pull me closer, though I wasn't sure that was possible. I fumbled with the room key, trying to open the door, to get inside, to get to the bed so I could touch her, so I could feel her, so I could love her.

And God do I love her, every little piece of her, from her cascading golden locks to her luscious lips, her blue eyes that peer into my soul, her fierce loyalty to her friends, her ever present sarcastic remarks, the way she (almost always) refuses to leave the house in anything but heels, even the way she dances listening to Justin Bieber.

We both knew it was wrong, but it felt so right. It was immoral, not because we're both girls. No, _that_ wasn't the immoral part. The immoral part was that she was with Caleb, and I, _I_ was with Ezra. But even that wasn't the _surprising_ part. The part that had shocked us, more than our irresistible attraction to each other, more than our infidelities, was the fact that after six months, our relationship, secret as it was, managed to completely escape everyone's notice, not that that hadn't been the point. Neither Spencer nor Emily seemed to notice the stolen glances we shared. Even A hadn't threatened or even hinted about it, leaving us to assume that meant that A didn't know either, and we were trying our damndest to keep it that way.

We knew we would lose everything if anyone found out, and there really is no rationalizing it, try as we might, but I suppose that love, real love, is never rational.

_My_ problem was that I had fallen in love with two people. I couldn't explain it even if I tried, there weren't words to describe it. The thought of losing either Ezra or Hanna was too painful to contemplate, though I knew eventually I would have to choose, and whoever I didn't pick, I would lose forever.

I finally managed to unlock the door to room 107 at the Hawthorne Motel in Ardmore. Hanna and I stumbled into the room blindly, and I kicked the door closed behind me, pushing Hanna down onto the ratty excuse for a bed that I hadn't actually looked at yet.

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	2. Chapter 2: Hanna

The only thing on my mind was Aria as she pushed me onto the bed. My hands tangled in her soft brown hair, dragging her down with me.

"God, I've missed you," she breathed into me, ripping off my jacket and tossing it somewhere, anywhere, as long as it wasn't on me.

"We've been hanging out all week," I said, knowing that now and the rest of the week were completely different.

During the week we were Hanna and Aria, best friends, hanging out with our other best friends Spencer and Emily. During the week I was Hanna dating Caleb, and she was Aria dating Ezra. During the week we were careful.

Now, we were raw, we were passionate, we were in love. Not that we weren't in love during the week too, but we couldn't express it like we could now.

I kicked off my heels as Aria stumbled her way out of her shoes.

"You know what I mean," Aria growled.

And I knew exactly what she meant, and how she felt, because I felt it too.

Aria fumbled with the zipper on my dress, needing to get me out of it as quickly as possible, which was ultimately her downfall as it made her more clumsy than she usually was, making it take longer to get it off than it would have otherwise.

I moaned into her lips as her hands ran teasingly down my back, pulling the dress down as she went.

"I missed you, too," I said, attempting to pull Aria's shirt off of her.

Aria broke the kiss only to place a trail of them down my neck until she found my pulse point, sucking on it tenderly, for a moment before moving on. We had to be careful not to leave any marks, which proved to be very hard to do because it meant we had to keep some level of control that we just wanted to let go of.

We slowly maneuvered ourselves so that we were more towards the center of the bed, trailing kisses all over each other. I felt Aria's left hand tracing circles on my thigh, while her right hand was teasing my breasts through the fabric of my bra. My lips reconnected with hers.

I felt a tingling on my stomach, slowly crossing from the right side to the left side. I screamed, jumping up as I realized that there was something crawling on it, causing Aria to jump up worriedly as well.

For the first time, I noticed the room we were in. It was filled with drab grays, and everything was worn, tattered or broken. I couldn't get myself back into the moment.

"I hate this," I groaned, sitting up.

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**A/N: As of September 16th all my current fics will be on hiatus, so that I can focus on writing my novel. For updates on my novel, or when I might resume my fics, follow me on twitter: CapeCodPhoenix I will be updating all my fics as much as possible between now and September 16th**


	3. Chapter 3: Aria

**I know I said I was going on hiatus, but apparently my brain doesn't agree with that decision, so I'm back!**

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"I hate this," Hanna groaned, sitting up.

I knew what she was talking about. She hated the sneaking around. She hated the sleezy motel rooms. She hated the pretending we were just friends. I knew, because I hated it, too.

"I know, baby," I said, sitting down next to her, wrapping my arms around her.

Hanna sighed in frustration, letting her head rest on my shoulder. I leaned my head against hers, sighing as well.

I wondered what life would be like if we had never met Ezra and Caleb. Would it be simpler? Would Hanna and I be able to love each other openly? Or would we even be together? It's not that I wished I'd never met Ezra, I didn't, but Ezra and I had the same problem Hanna and I had. We couldn't be together in public, at least not in the way we wanted to be. And because of A, Hanna and Caleb now had the same problem.

I lifted my head, and looked, as best I could given our positions, at my beautiful girlfriend. Some of her blonde locks had fallen in front of her face, and I gently tucked the loose hair behind her ear, so I could see her eyes.

"I love you," I blurted out without thinking.

It's not that it wasn't true, I do love her, I'm in love with her, I've been in love with her for months now, but neither of us had actually said it out loud before.

I saw her blush, and look up at me.

"You know that, right?" I asked her.

She leaned in, capturing my lips in hers. This kiss was different than the ones we'd had earlier tonight. It was soft, gentle, filled with love, but not filled with the desperation the other ones had had.

"I love you, too," Hanna said when she pulled away.

"I wish I didn't have to hide that," Hanna added, echoing her earlier thoughts.

"I know, I wish we didn't have to hide either, but I love Ezra, too," I said, causing Hanna to frown at the mention of Ezra, "and you love Caleb."

Her face softened when I mentioned Caleb.

Hanna looked like she was thinking, and hard at that.

She looked up at me, "How did this happen?"

I wasn't sure what she meant by 'this'. Did she mean us? Did she mean the disgusting room we were sitting in? Did she mean hiding out from A?

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"I mean, how can I be in love with two people?" she clarified.

"I don't know, maybe it's not meant to be understood."

Hanna nodded at me. We sat in silence, in thought.

I thought about how happy Hanna makes me, and about how happy Ezra makes me. I wondered if maybe falling in love with Hanna was the universe's way of telling me that I wasn't meant to be with Ezra, or that Ezra wasn't good enough, but I wasn't sure how that was possible. I fall more in love with him every moment I'm with him, but then, I fall more in love with Hanna every moment I'm with her, too.

"Aria?" Hanna said, breaking the silence.

"Yeah, babe?"

"If we were found out, and Ezra made you choose, who would you stay with?"

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	4. Chapter 4: Hanna

Aria stared at me, her eyes wide with fear. It wasn't me she was afraid of. At least I didn't think it was. The shock was evident in her face.

"God, Han, you really want me to choose right now?" Aria asked me.

I was honestly afraid to hear the answer.

"I…" I hesitated, I wasn't sure what exactly it was that I wanted to say.

Aria took my hand in hers squeezing it gently.

"I really don't know," Aria said, "I mean, what would you do if it was Caleb?"

It wasn't something I wanted to think about. On the other hand, it was something I was constantly thinking about.

I love Caleb so much, he's amazing. He cares about me, and about my friends. He'd do pretty much anything for me, I'm sure of it. But then I love Aria too. It's different with her. With her, I don't have to hide. I'm not sure if it's because we've been best friends for years, or maybe it's we've been together through everything A has put us through and through everything Alison had put us through, too, though it was never at the same level as A.

I'm afraid that if Caleb finds out about Aria and I, he will leave me. I'd like to think that he'd stay and he'd fight for what we have, but then, he's left before, and so have I. But if Caleb finds out, I'm pretty sure Ezra wouldn't be far behind him, not in a town like Rosewood with A looming about. No, I think it's safe to say that if Caleb finds out, so does Ezra. And if Caleb leaves, and Aria chooses Ezra, I think I might die. I can't lose them both. The thought of losing either of them hurts like hell, but both of them? My heart couldn't take it.

I looked down at my feet.

"I don't know either," I whispered quietly.

I felt a tear running down my cheek, but before I could do anything about it, Aria had wiped it away.

"Don't cry, baby," Aria said to me.

I looked up at her. The way she looked at me, so lovingly, and tender, and even with her eyes filled with worry for me, I'd never felt so safe before, and yet I'd never felt so afraid.

"I'm afraid of losing you," I said quietly.

"Han, whatever happens, I'm always going to be here for you. You won't lose me. You _can't_ lose me."

I knew that Aria meant what she said, but I also knew it wasn't true, even though I wanted to believe it. If Aria and I broke up, whether it be because of Ezra or Caleb, or for some other reason, we would both be devastated. I knew that if I had to choose, I wouldn't be able to look the person I didn't pick in the eyes. On the other hand, if Aria didn't choose me, I'd probably avoid her like the plague. It was already hard enough pretending that we were just friends at school, and, well, everywhere but these sketchy motels we go to, but knowing that I'll be with her soon, knowing I have these moments where it's just me and her and no one else, they help me to keep up the act. Without this, it would be too hard.

"I love you," I said leaning my head on Aria's.

"I love you, too, Han," Aria said.

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	5. Chapter 5: Aria

I was the first to arrive to our usual lunch table. I sat down, plastering a smile on my face, pretending to be happy. School was not my happy place. Not anymore at least. There was the constant fear of doing something small that may end up being used by A as blackmail. The looking around, wondering which of these people surrounding you, seemingly minding their own business, could really be watching you, gathering any piece of information that may be useful to the A team. Then there was the constant longing for Hanna. Seeing her and wanting to take her into my arms, take her lips in mine, and just love her. Not that anything stopped me from loving her, I just couldn't _show_ that I loved her, which was frustrating. And then there was the fact that I no longer saw Ezra here anymore, which was admittedly my fault, but it was better that way. It was safer that way.

I looked around for any sign of my friends. I saw Hanna enter the cafeteria, and head for the lunch line. My eyes lingered on her.

She looked beautiful, but then, she always looked beautiful. Her blonde waves cascaded downward, hanging just above her shoulders. She looked different today, her outfit didn't match her usual style. She was wearing a white t-shirt, that, if I knew her as well as I thought I did, was probably at least fifty percent silk or something. That combined with the pair of dark-wash skinny jeans she was wearing reminded me of something Emily might wear. She also wore a black blazer that could compete with the best of Spencer's. She still donned heels, but they were shorter than usual, and a little less strappy.

I felt my heart race as I watched her from afar.

"Aria?" Spencer's voice pulled me out of my trance.

I looked at Spencer, who was now sitting next to me with a worried expression on her face.

"Are you okay?" she asked me.

I wasn't, and yet I was. I wasn't okay because all I wanted to do right now was run to Hanna, take her in my arms and kiss her, but for obvious reasons, one of which being Caleb sitting four tables away, I couldn't. But I had her love, and I had Ezra's love, and I had the most amazing best friends that I could ever ask for, so it didn't make sense for me to be anything less than okay. Aside from the sadistic and torturous "A", my life right now was pretty good.

"Yeah, sorry, I just spaced," I said to her.

She nodded, seemingly trying to evaluate me.

"You look different," she observed.

I wondered what she meant. How did I look now? How is it different than any other day?

I shrugged, marginalizing it to the fact that I _always_ looked different. It's just how I was. I blazed my own trail, unafraid to try new things and different looks, like the pink streak in my hair that I used to have.

Hanna walked over with her tray of food. I looked at her and smiled. My heart instantly warmed.

"Hey," Hanna said.

"Only you could pull off something that casual with those heels and pull it off," I said, noticing that her heels were actually taller than I'd first surmised.

Spencer laughed, and Hanna blushed. Only Hanna would know that that was code for 'You look amazing and I love you.'

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	6. Chapter 6: Hanna

It wasn't fair. I was in love with two people and I can't be with either one of them thanks to A. At least, not the way I want to be. I want to be able to hold their hands, kiss them, even be a bit of a tease, but I can only be with them far away from Rosewood. But then, if there was no A, I probably wouldn't have had either of them.

I watched Aria from a distance, my eyes following her every move, from the flip of her hair to the sway of her hips. I licked my lip unconsciously.

Sure, I could be standing next to her, and normally, I would be, but it was getting so hard pretending to be just friends in front of everybody. It had been a few weeks since we were able to get together, and then our meeting had been disrupted when that damn bug decided to alert me to exactly where we were. It had never been a problem before; I usually didn't have time to notice the conditions we were in. Plus that motel had been especially gross and disgusting. But after all this time, every time I stand near her it takes all I have not to just jump her bones, even in the middle of the hallway.

I've been able to see Caleb more recently. He's been helping us again with trying to figure out and stop A.

The problem is, when A is gone, I'll have to choose between Caleb and Aria. I suppose theoretically, Aria and I could keep sneaking around, but in all honesty, it's getting to hard to keep up the charade.

Finally, when Spencer and Emily had made it to Aria's locker, I walked over and joined them.

"Is that mine?" I smirked at Aria.

Aria rolled her eyes at me. "You said I could borrow it, remember?" Aria smirked. I hadn't said she could borrow it, but she must have stolen it from my closet the last time she was over. We made it a point, these days, to never be alone together in each other's houses, so she must have gotten it when all four of us were there. How she did it without anyone noticing was beyond me.

"Right," I said, "Must have slipped my mind. So what _else_ did I miss?"

Aria smiled at my double meaning. She knew that, aside from asking what was going on, I was asking her what else she's stolen from my closet.

"We were just…" Spencer started.

"No. We weren't," Emily glared at Spencer.

"But…" Spencer tried again.

"No," Emily said firmly, before turning around and walking away.

Spencer sighed, before following her.

"What was that about?" I asked.

"Spencer's insisting that Paige is A. Emily, obviously, doesn't like that," Aria explained.

I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket.

_You have a decision to make. You have 2 days or I'll decide for you –A_

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	7. Chapter 7: Aria

**This Chapter is for LA Bee123. This story is still on hiatus, and will subsequently not be updated for a while, though it is far from completed.**

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I had that feeling in the pit of my stomach, that feeling where you know something is wrong but you don't know what it is.

Only, there were lots of things wrong. God only knew what 'A' had up their sleeve.

I tried not to dwell on it too much, though. Until I could figure out what exactly was wrong, there was nothing I could do about it.

At least it was Saturday, which meant that today I was spending the day at Ezra's apartment. Normally, Saturdays were good days, but today, Ezra hadn't been at his apartment when I arrived. I used the spare key to let myself in.

I wondered where he could be. At first I thought maybe he had gone to get some food, but it's been two hours since I arrived. I called his cell and nobody answered.

I was frustrated. I briefly wondered if I should just leave. I could pick Hanna up and we could drive somewhere, anywhere. It had been too long since they'd had time together.

I felt guilty for thinking about Hanna in Ezra's apartment. It reminded me that I was cheating on him.

That feeling in the pit of my stomach wouldn't go away. As guilty as thinking about Hanna here made me feel, I was seriously considering going to find her. Ezra wasn't here anyway, and I just needed someone to hold me right now. Someone to tell me that everything was going to be okay, because right now, I felt like everything was about to fall apart.

I sighed in relief when I heard Ezra's key in the door. The door swung open and Ezra stepped into the apartment. Only he wasn't alone. There was a boy behind him. I would guess he was my age, give or take a year or so.

"Ezra?" I questioned. Why would he bring someone over on our day?

Ezra smiled at me. It was hard to be upset with him when he looked at me like that. Like I was his whole world. Like I had just made his day better just by him seeing me.

"Aria," Ezra said. "I'm so sorry, I kind of got caught up." He gestured to the boy now beside him.

"Aria, this is my brother, Wesley. Wes, this is my girlfriend, Aria."

I'm sure my jaw was hanging open. I was meeting Ezra's brother. And Ezra had introduced me as his girlfriend. It made sense, since I was, but it was strange. We'd never really had the chance to introduce each other as boyfriend or girlfriend, what with the whole controversy and everything.

Wesley grinned at me. "Nice to meet you."

I regained my composure, "Oh, It's nice to meet you, too."

I looked at Ezra, "What's going on?"

It was Wesley that answered. "I got kicked out of school. I'm avoiding my mother."

Oh.

There was a knock on the door as my phone went off, signaling I had a text._  
_

Ezra opened the door. I looked up to see a woman standing there that I could only assume to be their mother, if the look on their faces was any indication.

I looked at my phone, opening the new message.

_We need to talk –Hanna_


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